Author Topic: Count as relapse? (may trig)  (Read 266 times)

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Offline Theres always light

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Count as relapse? (may trig)
« on: March 07, 2017, 12:14:39 PM »

 :trig:

It got a little bit to much and I ended up scratching my arm with a sharp object, I didn't cut and it wasn't my intention to harm, I just needed something and thought dragging it lightly on my skin didn't really count as harming, but it left some bright red marks, long ones and they sting a little, I was wondering if that means I relapsed or if it's just a miner thing, does it really count as harming? And the other thing is does anyone know how to get rid of the marks?

Offline Vermilion

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Re: Count as relapse? (may trig)
« Reply #1 on: March 08, 2017, 12:18:45 PM »
What was your intention when you decided to lightly drag that object across your skin? You say you 'needed something', what was it you needed? It sounds like SH to me but maybe the intention was in your subconscious, I can't think of another reason that you'd take an object to your skin like that. I've done it where I've told myself that I didn't want to harm but deep down I did want to harm. To get rid of the marks I'd suggest an antiseptic cream, I find that baby bum cream is great for soothing scratches and they have antiseptic in them to promote healing. Try something like sudocrem or bepanthen, they're the ones I use for scratches.
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Offline Theres always light

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Re: Count as relapse? (may trig)
« Reply #2 on: March 12, 2017, 10:11:05 AM »
Thanks for the reply Vermilion, I didn't really have an intention in mind, I needed something like harming but I didn't want to, so I thought if I didn't go rough then it would be ok but I kept going over it a bit to much and it is probably classed as harming, I needed my head to be clear, I needed focus and I think I just really wanted a distraction to be honest. I really wanted to harm the way I normally do but am trying not to, it's just always there.

Offline Lorien

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Re: Count as relapse? (may trig)
« Reply #3 on: March 19, 2017, 05:50:38 PM »
it sounds a lot like harm minimisation - doing something but reducing the risk. I think in general that's a pretty good way to manage things if you are worried about things escalating. I guess I read it as wanting to cut but doing less than you would ordinarily. I would agree with Vermilion that it is self harm - but I'd say it is more positive than not. Is it worth trying to get the same result other ways? You've said it helps you focus, what is stopping you focus now? It kind of sounds like wanting to hurt yourself is making you not focused so cutting would remove that barrier to focus - so what is the motivation behind the distracting want to cut. If you can work out that, you might be able to circumvent the cutting.
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