Hi, sorry if this isn't the right place for this but I kindof would primarily like advice from friends/family rather than other SHers, so I figured maybe this might be the best place.
I've been SHing for about 9 years, and having tried over and over again I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I'm unable to quit on my own, however stupid that is.
My problem is that when I was 15 (about 4 years ago) my parents found out that I had been doing this, and I was referred to CAMHS and given that opportunity of help, and I desperately lied my way out of it and somehow managed to convinced everyone that I'd only done it 3 times.
The situation is kindof complicated by the fact that my dad is very uninvolved, my mum is not really emotionally equipped to deal with it, and I don't have any close extended family. I have a few really good friends but my best friend really struggles with anxiety himself and so I don't feel it's fair to put my problems on him as well, and just generally I don't really know what I expect them to do, so it just generally feels really selfish to involve them.
So I guess I don't really know what the question is but I'd just like advice from the family/friends side of it, as I feel like I had my chance at help and I blew it, but at the same time I'll be 20 soon and I don't want to carry on like this.
Thanks if anyone can be bothered to read all that, any advice would be really really appreciated, even if it is just confirming that I blew it 4 years ago and just need to deal with it (: