Bad person *sh ed*

[justine]

not horrible. i think you have a LOT on your plate and i hope things get easier for you xx xx thinking about you hun xx xx

+1 to that, your obviosuly struggling now, so give yourself a break, you don't have to be perfect all the time, especially at times like these x x

[mirrhi]

What does struggling actually mean though?  I have a fella I love who loves me for some unknown reason, fab boys even thought they're not mine, family, job, etc.  I have crappy days but they're srvivable.  I'm ashamed of the 'struggle' people seem to think I have, it is pathetic.

[justine]

the struggle isn't what you have, it's a battle of the thoughts and emotions your body gives you. The rich kid with the perfect parents, perfect school, and perfect friends can still struggle. Life can be really tough sometimes, and it doesn't matter who you are or what your situation, everyone is entitled to some slack sometimes, even if that some is a long period of time.

[mirrhi]

everyone is entitled to some slack sometimes, even if that some is a long period of time.

There has to be an end though right?

[justine]

the end is when you feel better and aren't struggling anymore, and yes that does come. It's accepting help, and moving forwards that gets you there. Thing is, that is the hardest part. The reason people struggle for so long, is they don't move forwards. Of course it's really tough and that is why. Much easier said than done, especially for those that cant see clearly. Thing is, mental health issues, including general not being able to cope, is actually a big thing. Just because it's not a physical thing, somehing you can see, it seems to feel like you should be ok, when in fact you are entitled to not be ok. Sorry if that doesn't make sense x x

[mirrhi]

the end is when you feel better and aren't struggling anymore

The whole struggling thing is what I struggle with    You do make sense though, I get what you mean, I just feel so totally inadequate of it.

[justine]

your only human just like the rest of us. When you walk down the street, everyone seems normal and coping right? You may think how come they all get to have good lives and cope well and I don't? Well in actuall fact a lot of these peole you see are also struggling, you just can't tell. If 1 in 4 people have a mental health issue, and you see 100 people in town, 25 of those you walk past are also likley to be struggling too.

Whe your a kid you (usually) get things easy. You don't have responsibilities, and you can generally do what you want and someone else will sort it all out for you. If you want something bad for you, it simply gets taken away. But when you get older you have responsibilities, and those people aren't there anymore, your kinda on your own. Yous till the same kid though. That's why people struggle. Add on top of that mental health and bam it gets worse. I struggle too you know. I find it hard to keep up at work, and sometimes feel i'm incompetent. I struggle at home sometimes too. And I'm relatively mental problem free.

Struggling is far morecommon that you think, it's just hidden in our society.

[mirrhi]

Thanks Justine.  I know that's all true 'logically', and can apply it to everyone else, but not me.  I can't be 'struggling' I'm just being pathetic and self pitying, I can cope, I just need to carry on and stop being so sorry for myself, and then I end up so angry at myself I want to SH, slap my stupid face, cry, scream, rant, anything to get rid of those knots inside me 

[justine]

It applies to you too mirrhi, your not an excpetion. However, I do see your point about the woe is me attitude. Sometimes when I get down i'm a bit like that, then  I shake my head and go what the hell am I doing? and pick myself right back up to being happy again. It still doesn't make you a bad person though, which ever way. I can't say if you are struggling, or just have a woe is me attitude, but either way it doesn't make a difference to the person you are.