confused, upset and bewildered mum

[secretsmile]

Hi, I just wanted to say that I know exactley what you are going through.. I am not a mother, but I'm older sister to a 16 year old who is anorexic/bulimic and self harms. As an ex self harmer/ slightly bulimic I have some understanding. However, reading your posts your daughter sounds so similar to my sister, she is currently on her 8th week in a Unit..after taking several tablets etc etc, she has gone missing for hours, taken drastic action on her appearance (cut her hair off) and is monitered almost 24/7 because she is high risk of throwing up or harming herself... I am not wanting to scare you, I'm wanting to try and say that you and your family are not alone. It is the most stressful thing any of my family have ever had to deal with.. But I do have hope that it will ger better, I am living proof, I was never as bad as my sister but I am now not self harming and only throwing up if I've had a drink!! We have tried to remove all sharp objects because it removes temptation (if she wants to do it she will find away but we have done our bit to help) so just to let you know you can get through this, and I know its really hard but ensure your 12 year old is aware she is still important as often seeing the attention others get can make siblings feel left out etc, abit like when a new baby is born! As I say, I don't have much advice but I wanted you to know you're not alone!

[gillian]

Annemh   i so identify with everything you are going through.  it brought it all back to me about how it was when my daughter was at her lowest. I felt on the verge of breaking down all the time. Just a note to give you encouragement that things can get better. My daughter has found prozac helpful and counselling and self esteem classes.  she is now so much better and is getting her life back.  There is always hope that your daughter will also find a way out of her problems and she will be so grateful for the love and support that you are currently giving her.  My thoughts are with you.

[annemh]

  Hi everyone ... Many thanks for your kind words and encouragement I really appreciate it ... Well things did start to look up a little, my daughter was accepting help (just about) and even started attending a group ... And then it all went wrong and she reacted badly to the prozac, her skin felt like it was literally crawling ... So she had to stop her medication and wait to start a new one (lustral) which she started 5 days ago ... Unfortunately she decided getting very drunk on Friday night was a great idea, I had to get her home by sending a taxi to find her (I don't drive) I then told her off for drinking on her medication (probably a big mistake) and got her tucked into bed ... What I did not realise was that she had a tool hidden and when I went to get her a glass of water( literally two minuets) she managed to cut her arms several times .... I patched her up and sat her back downstairs while I went to find the tool not realising she had hidden it in her mouth and by the time I got back down stairs cause she called me she had cut her arms and leg quite badly..... I patched her up again and sat with her for most of the night .... Needless to say but she feels awful now, the new medication has not started to work and she feels full of guilt and remorse ( she had not cut for 2 or 3 weeks and was starting to heal) and now she feels it is all not worth it again .... It feels like we are back at square one .... Sorry to go on but I can't really express myself anywhere but on here and I am slowly going down hill myself, I don't know how much longer I can watch my baby girl destroy herself.

[Tigger]

Have read your posts just wanted to let you know that you are an AMAZING! mum keep up all you are doing and keep offloading on here and anywhere else you can get help for yourself if you need it. Its hard to stand on the outside feeling helpless but you are doing FAB

I'm afraid the only advice i have is to keep looking after you too and keep making both your children feel loved and special as you are doing 

[greenday]

hi just wanting to say your doing realy well keep it up