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Author Topic: think mum has an ed?  (Read 1872 times)
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Swinks
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« on: November 18, 2009, 09:55:49 AM »

ok so i no this sounds stupid but im guiessing im only thinking this because of my ed.. however she was the cause of mine. i've never known her to be fat. even after giving birth to 2 kids she's always been tiny. and been able to wear childrens clothes and shoes. quite lucky really, wish i could. but i also never knew her to eat properly. she would always just chuck a mars bar down her throat. when we all lived together she would eat a proper meal in the evening- we had no choice. but then throughout the day would always be toast or sweets.
she's a proffesional dancer and instructor so i can understand her being thin from this. she sparked my ed by always calling me fat which in turn made me become anorexic. i am now wondering if she has an ed because after not hearing from her in months, i text her a picture of a dress i made a few weeks back, and this morning she replied to me, she was saying how she's living off fresh air and not eating so she can pay for the car ect... doesnt suprise me, she used to have a gambling problem.

so where do i go from here? i dont speak or see the woman.. i feel really awkward
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billy
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« Reply #1 on: November 18, 2009, 05:21:18 PM »

is there anyone else in ur family u could talk to abou this?
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Swinks
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« Reply #2 on: November 18, 2009, 05:28:11 PM »

i dont really have any family. well not on her side anyway
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billy
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« Reply #3 on: November 18, 2009, 05:31:00 PM »

could u try talking to her about it even if it is difficult it might help her and put ur mind at rest?
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"evrything can be recycled except time!"

"evrything will be ok in the end
if its not ok
its not the end!"

"remember when we were YOUNG and couldn't wait to grow up? ...WOW, what the hell were we thinking!?!?"
Swinks
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« Reply #4 on: November 18, 2009, 05:38:50 PM »

that would be impossible. we dont talk. that was the first contact i had in months and as usual im probs over anylising the situation
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billy
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« Reply #5 on: November 18, 2009, 05:40:12 PM »

 littlehug1
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"evrything can be recycled except time!"

"evrything will be ok in the end
if its not ok
its not the end!"

"remember when we were YOUNG and couldn't wait to grow up? ...WOW, what the hell were we thinking!?!?"
emilysdad
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« Reply #6 on: November 19, 2009, 11:40:54 AM »

Hey Swinks,
Your mum is a dancer and restrictive eating has always been prevelant in Dance, modeling and acting circles it unfortunately goes with the job almost.
I'm sorry to hear that unkind and thoughtless remarks from her lead to your ed, sometimes those we look up to most can be thoughtless and unkind without meaning to and it is rotten that this should still be affecting you, have you thought about therapy to try and help you look at all this from another perspective?
Bottom line is your mum has been living and coping her own way for so long that you can't change things ( I know, my wife was actually bulemic when I met her but it was hidden from me, in 20 years we have only been able to talk about the issues once and that because of my daughters problems).
You can't change your mum, only she can do that, but you can look for help for yourself so this doen't follow you throughout your life.

All the best,
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