Author Topic: Sister  (Read 2318 times)

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Offline Yoshi

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« on: July 30, 2009, 08:45:30 AM »
My sister is an absolute (insert swear word) to me. I haven't lived with them for 5 years. She knew about the abuse but prefers to take my mum's lead and blame me for everything. The stuff she has said to me is exactly like what my mother says. The last time she was so horrible I said I was not going to be able to talk to her anymore and then had a complete 5 day breakdown. She's 20. I'm 21. She's on my facebook. She's very much like my mother, dramatic, attention seeking and very very manipulative. Recently, her facebook statuses have been saying very depressing things. The latest is "X is tired of life" ... the others have hinted at suicide and I know she has SH (albeit very shortlived and not too serious, don't shoot me for saying that but she was calling me to tell me every time she'd done it).

I'm not sure what to do. I find it very hard to stay well away which is what I need to do. She isn't fair to me, I can see that and I can't handle the stuff she says to me and the way she behaves towards me. What's more I don't deserve it. I understand she's angry and just lashing out at me because I'm the easy, vulnerable target who is too far away to act on anything. Last time, I was so "calm" in my responses she retorted that I was smug and whatever. Some of you may remember me posting about it. I don't know what I should do. I can't contact my mum, I can't handle my sister's responses because they will be purposefully hurtful, but at the same time I'm not surprised she's messed up too, I am concerned about the way she is and I know she's probably just dealing with what happened in a different way to me. She did go off the rails when I left, moved out after my mum pushed her down the stairs, getting stoned all the time, did not do her A levels despite being smart and has now split with another boyfriend. I know there is a lot of jealousy towards me.

What do you think I should do?
« Last Edit: July 30, 2009, 08:48:41 AM by weedy »
"The problem with always being a conformist is that when you try to change the system from within, it's not you who changes the system; it's the system that will eventually change you."

Offline roboticpie

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Re: Sister
« Reply #1 on: July 30, 2009, 09:03:54 AM »
Heya, I've experienced similar things but it's from my brother. I guess there really aren't any ways to stop it cos it's her way of venting, and at least she isn't taking it out on herself. I don't mean it's healthy that she's lashing out at you, but when my brother is screaming and all that I'm just thankful he hasn't turned to sh to cope. It's difficult but whenever she does it remind yourself that you don't deserve to be treated like that and are none of the things she said. There are times when you almost want to believe it's your fault but as you said, you know she isn't being fair.

Will there be times when she's a bit calmer and can talk to you? Or do it on Facebook where you can post it as a reply to her statuses?

Offline billy

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Re: Sister
« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2009, 10:41:25 AM »

this must be really heard could u try talking to one of her friends?

or could u try talking to her about it and if she starts being horrid just say i can see ur not ready to talk just now but i near for u when u r or somthing like that
"evrything can be recycled except time!"

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